Tag Archives: Humane Society

A Thank You Note

I actually had another post ready to go, but you’ll have to wait a couple days to be mildly amused or disappointed. Why, you ask?

Because I realized it’s been almost one year since I released my humble little book, and decided to ramble reflect on the past year instead.

First of all, I want to thank each and every person who ever bought it, tweeted about it, sent me a note/picture about it or even used it as a coaster for beer. You have no idea how humbling it was when you did this, and I’m still amazed that anyone cares what I say.

But for those who don’t know the story, I didn’t self-publish this book to try and make money, as that is a laughable notion.

No, I wanted a collection of my words I could hold in my hand and give to my mom for a Christmas present. She’s my biggest fan, and I wanted to make sure that I didn’t accidentally delete my blog in a fit of frustrated rage and lose a compelling account of my Tooth Fairy campaign.

I also published it so I could share my crazy view on things and maybe make you laugh, smile or feel a bit more normal. I decided that if you invested a little bit of time and money into reading it, I would give a little bit of time and money back by donating all the profits to the local Humane Society.

You can read about all that over here, so I won’t rehash the whole thing.

All I can say is that a year later, I’m still proud I took the chance when I did. It was a lot of work, but seeing the look on my mom’s face when I gave it to her and when we got to deliver the goods to the Humane Society was priceless, as are the comments I still get today.

With that said, I can’t help but wonder what’s next.

The last year of blogging has taught me so much—about myself, about others, about writing, about life—but there are many times when I feel like maybe I’ve said everything I want to say. More often than not I’ll think, “I should blog about that!” only to realize I wrote up that post just last year.

After three years it gets hard to keep churning things out, but the reason I put pressure on myself is simply because I need something — something that makes me feel creative, makes me feel wanted, that connects me to people who feel the same way.

True, some days I want to delete the damn thing, and maybe some day that will happen. But for now, I still kind of like it and am sticking around for a bit.

And to answer the question I get once in awhile, yes, I’ve thought about doing another book. I think I’ve defined my voice and perhaps even stepped up my game since the last book came out. But I also feel like maybe that (sales) ship has sailed and I really hate self-promotion, which is kind of important with things.

Plus, I’ve already used the one picture I have for the cover on the first one, so there’s that.

Anyway, this whole long ramble is to sincerely thank you for your support this past year—not just with the book, but with the blog and with me as a person. I know readers and blogs come and go, and I am truly thankful for those who are with me today.

That’s as mushy as I get. Now it’s your turn.

Who do you think needs a thank you? I don’t care if it’s the inventor of the OveGlove (genius!) or the nice person who told you there was a fabric softener sheet sticking out of the ass of your pants. Let’s give thanks.

Monie Monie

As much as I love animals and support rescues with all of my heart, I understand people’s confusion when they find out I don’t have a pet of my own right now. After all,  I have the resources to take care of a pet, the experience and a whole house to myself. So what’s the deal?

There’s no simple answer, but when asked I tell people it’s because I don’t want hair all over my house, accidents on my new carpet or to have to pay for everything that comes along with their care.

All of those things are entirely true.

My OCD flips out when anyone comes to my house, much less a creature roaming around shedding and hacking things up. But the main reason—the one I don’t tell people—is that a) I don’t want to get too attached and b) I don’t want anyone (pet or person) to expect anything from me.

The truth is that I’ve been in “that place” more than I haven’t been lately. By all outward appearances I’m fully functional and fine, but internally I’m anything but.

Don’t worry. I won’t write about it again, as I’ve probably talked about it too much as it is. But as much as I want to pretend things are fine, it’s kind of hard to ignore when all you want to do is absolutely nothing, and anyone—even your own mom—entering your house makes your skin crawl as you fight the urge to clean.

Plus, a majority of the time I feel incapable of taking care of myself and the prospect of having something else to tend to shoots my anxiety up. It’s easier to keep my world very narrow, very controlled and to not get attached to too much.

But easier doesn’t mean better.

And the past couple of weeks I’ve spent entirely too much time looking at cats on the Humane Society website, and then in person, letting myself get a little excited about bringing an animal in. I knew I would want an older cat, one that just needed to live out their days completely spoiled and loved, but I still had a lot of reservations (see above, times 1,263.)

Then I found her.


Meet Monie.

She’s 10 years old and was brought in only because the previous owners had a baby. That’s the only reason. So after weighing the pros and cons entirely too much, I decided to shut off my brain and bring her home.

I’m still freaking out in a neurotic way, but hoping that along with companionship, this will help me get out of my head, maybe injecting some literal and metaphorical hair and hacking in the places I’ve so carefully controlled to this point.

She’s a short hair, but she’s hairy. She’s calm and clean, but there will be messes. She’s older, but she’ll be loved. Not just because she deserves it, but because I want to let myself love her.


I realize this is a very dramatic interpretation for the simple act of getting a cat, but for me, this will be a huge step.

Because while technically I “saved” her,  I’m kind of hoping that she can save me.

(We’ll keep you updated.)

 Buy the book. Save a kitten.

Buy the Book. Save a Kitten

I’ve had a lot of people tell me I should write a book. And while I don’t like people telling me what to do, once in a great while I will humor them.

So I wrote a book.

You should probably buy it


Thank you to Amy for her help with the covers.

Before you go thinking anything fancy, let me tell you that it’s self-published and the whole process has take more time and energy (and money) than I planned on. The pictures aren’t exactly stellar and I’m sure there’s at least one rogue punctuation mark somewhere.

But I decided I wanted a collection of my words I could hold in my hand and give to my mom,  something I couldn’t accidentally delete while looking for a vegan cheesecake recipe on the Internet.

Pageflex Persona [document: PRS0000038_00060]

This is the front and back cover and it looks better in person, so you should probably just buy it.

So, the result is this book—150 pages of posts from the past two years that you can read while you’re on the crapper, either in paperback or Kindle format from the CreateSpace store orAmazon.

But that’s not the cool thing.

The cool thing is that if you buy this book, you can help save a shelter animal (this is where the kitten and/or dog and/or one-eyed hamster come in.)

I didn’t publish this book to try and make money, as that is a laughable notion. I published it so I could share my crazy view on things and maybe make you laugh, smile or feel a bit more normal. So if you invest a little bit of time and money into reading it, I will give a little bit of time and money back.

Any profits that are made from this book will go directly into an “Animals Have Issues” fund for the Humane Society and used to fund our annual gift.

You know I love my shelter animals, and more than 8 million animals enter shelters every year. As you know, you get what you give, and for the cost of some overpriced coffee, you can get something cool and give back something tangible (and avoid having to listen to someone in front of you order a half-caff, skim, sugar-free, extra hot mocha with 1 3/4 pumps of calorie-free syrup, extra oxygen and 75 sprinkles.)

So with a click of the mouse, a sharing/StumblingUpon/Tweet of this post, we can build up some kick-ass support for some animals that, well, have issues of their own and need some help.

Sound like a plan?

So in case you’re like me and need things spelled out for you:

  1. Buy the book either here or here and the Kindle version here
  2. Tell a friend or ten
  3. Write a review on Amazon and help me get the word out
  4. Save a kitten and a puppy and some abandoned one-eyed hamster
  5. Enter the pantheon of awesomeness

Disclaimer: Amazon is still building the page, so there’s no description or “look inside” feature yet, but you can still buy it and I’ll update this when it’s done.

Also, I’m still trying to figure out how to pimp the book out with a picture/link on the front of my blog. It seems WordPress doesn’t allow the convenient link from Amazon, so I’m trying to figure out an alternative without violence (help!)

I promise not to hit you over the head with this for too long—I’ll be back to my regularly rambling neurosis soon enough.

But for now?

I wrote a book.

It’s the holiday season and this makes a fast and easy gift.

You should probably buy it. 

Buy the book. Save a kitten.  

*Press materials available upon request