It’s Friday! Another blogger is sharing their issues! Exclamation points!
Today it’s Jen from “People I Want to Punch In the Throat,” and given the name of her blog, it’s natural to assume she has issues.
If you’ve ever heard of the Elf on the Shelf, you’ve heard of Jen. If you’ve ever heard of “I Just Want to Be Alone”—and if you read this blog, I’ve shoved it down your throat because I was ridiculously honored to be included—you’ve heard of Jen.
I could sit here and ramble about all her other books—including two new ones that are dropping this September and then in fall of 2015—but I’ll let you figure that out on your own because this post is already long and there’s a giveaway at the end.
Free stuff! Exclamation point!
So without further ado, here’s Jen.
Name: Jen Mann
Where, what, and why do you write?
I write everywhere. I’ve been known to write in my car on the pickup line at school, I write in my bed, I write in my office. You name it, I’ve probably written there. I like to write on a laptop, so I’m always hauling a laptop around with me. A notebook and pen would be too simple for me. I much prefer to sit poolside with a hot piece of machinery on my lap. Plus, then people will stop and say, “Are you a writer?”
Why do I write? That one’s easy. I write so that I don’t kill. I write to vent my spleen. If I don’t write it down then I might literally explode. A wise blogger (whose name I can’t remember) once said, “If I don’t write it on my blog, then did it really happen?” When you have that kind of ego, then you have to be a writer. Plus, I’m not cut out for manual labor, so this writing thing needs to work for me.
(Editor’s note: Since she can’t remember the name of the blogger but appreciated the advice, let’s just pretend it was me. Moving on…)
First thing you think of when you wake up in the morning?
I need a nap.
What’s the one “issue” or frustration annoying you the most right now?
Anything and everything back to school. We’re starting our second week of school and it’s been a nightmare. Everyone is exhausted, and my kids are crying every morning because they don’t want to get up. They whine that school is hard this year. Ha. You should see fourth grade spelling words: Art. Give me a break, Gomer.
We’re having a tough time getting back into the routine of checking homework, packing ah-may-zing fun and healthy lunches, finding clean clothes to wear each day and shelling out hundreds of dollars for new clothes, markers and glue sticks (NOT the purple ones!!), PTO membership and renting violins. Yes, I rented a violin this year. I am looking forward to the practices because I like to hear the sound of dying cats.
Three websites you visit every day?
Huffington Post, Jezebel and The Onion.
(Editor’s note: By “Huffington Post” of “The Onion” I’m sure she meant Abby Has Issues. Carry on.)
What’s an unusual talent and/or accomplishment you could never put on a resume?
I can change a diaper using one hand while holding onto a squirmy toddler with the other.
Favorite place to be?
In my bed. Don’t get excited, Hubs. I like to be there alone. Sleeping.
If you could rule the land for one day, what laws would you create and enforce?
Citizens may key any car that isn’t parked properly between the lines.
What TV show would you want to appear on?
Daily Show with Jon Stewart. I’ve been watching this show since the beginning and I dream of one day sitting across the table from Jon. I’ll be so star-struck though so the interview will go terribly because I’ll just keep giggling uncontrollably and saying stuff like, “Oh my God, it’s you.”
Best and worst things I could find in your refrigerator right now?
Best would be leftover burrito from lunch. Worst would be leftover burrito from six months ago.
What question do you wish I had asked you and what would be your reply?
Where can I buy your new book, Jen? Amazon, of course!
And because she’s a giver, we’re also giving away one copy of “I Just Want to Be Alone” today to a random person who comments on this post answering the question below. The giveaway is open to U.S. residents with a sense of humor and a random winner will be drawn on Tuesday morning and notified via email.
Even if you have a copy of the book, play along. You don’t want to get on her bad side.
Who do you want to punch in the throat?