FYI: Mindless Monday Edition

Some days I get a decent idea and go with it, writing effortlessly for a relatively long stretch of time—an hour is impressive in my world—and feel great about what I’ve done.

Tonight? Not so much.

Instead, I will share a few random things that have streaked through my brain in their raw naked glory—or at least a few I can remember.

It’s time for FYIs: Mindless Monday Edition!

cadbury1

Chocolate Cadbury Crack

Every time I hear clips of Lady Gaga music I get Madonna songs stuck in my head. Coincidence? I think not.

It’s easier to just throw away the shower curtain liner and buy a new one than it is to scrub the shower curtain liner. Contrary to popular belief, this is not the case with mini-blinds.

April showers in Michigan bring prolonged Seasonal Affective Disorder much sooner than they bring May flowers.

What we imagine events to mean will color the way we feel about ourselves, about the people in our lives and about the world at large.

Melissa Rivers looks just like Steven Tyler.

steven-tyler-e-melissa-rivers

Dude looks like a lady—or lady looks like a dude.

Loud cell phone conversations in public are the “reply all” of real life. It’s annoying and I will tell you this.

Sometimes I try too hard and sometimes not enough. It’s annoying—but it’s also okay—and I will tell myself this.

I can watch the Weather Channel’s “Local on the 8s” and get so distracted by the trippy music that I have no idea what forecast I just saw.

It takes infinitely longer to fold and put away laundry than it takes to actually wash the stuff. (Cut out the middle man and don’t fold. You’ll add hours to your life.)

Having people notice a new haircut made me feel good enough to cancel out the guilt I had for cheating on my hairdresser.

There is yoga, and then there is yoga-flavored exercise.

yogajmichael

Yes, Jillian. I’m talking to you.

On that note, if I need a boost in self-esteem, I just turn on Exercise TV and listen to the manic trainers tell me I’m “doing great!” and “looking fabulous!” and that they’re extremely proud of me.

I still want a goat.

Gay men in their ‘30s make the best cupcakes, and Sangria—and jokes about gay men, cupcakes and Sangria.

Straight men in their ‘30s don’t know what the hell Sangria is—and make philosophical arguments about the vastness of the universe that are inversely proportional in logic to the amount of beer consumed.

Bad things happen to good people. Good things happen to bad people. I would still rather be a “good people.”

If I can’t have a goat, I want him.

So what can you contribute to Mindless Monday? Any FYIs floating around?

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23 responses to “FYI: Mindless Monday Edition

  1. I want that fat gopher guy too. He’s adorable!

  2. Kath (My Funny Little Life)

    The mammot is adorable! (So are goats. :D) You might also like him:

  3. We are total housekeeping soul sisters, I do believe. I always keep extra shower curtain liners on hand and have never in my life even tried to clean one. They cost $1.89, chuck the biohazard and put up a fresh one…

    I also don’t fold clothes. Only the ones that I never wear are even semi-organized and stored in drawers. If it’s not on a hanger, it’s in a heap, although the heap is strategically stratified such that I can pretty much find what I need on demand.

    I hope your week is off to a good start, take care!

  4. fyi: everytime i clean my bathroom naked i think of you. i guess maybe i should post the link to explain, but im too lazy to go find it.

  5. What are all these adorable creatures? I’ve no clue what species they are?!

    I feel somehow virtuous when I grab clothes to wear out of the laundry basket and dishes out of the dishwasher- and just use them. Saves the middle step.

    Mini eggs are the bomb. So are marshmallow peeps. And reese’s easter egg shaped peanut butter crack.

    Happy Monday!

    • I actually saw a show once that said the ratio of peanut butter to chocolate in Reese’s Easter Eggs is actually 2:1 in comparison to regular Reese’s PB Cups. I wouldn’t know because I stick to those mini chocolate eggs 😉

  6. Get out of my mind…

    You had to go and mention mini eggs, eh? I’ve managed to avoid thinking about them…until now. Sometimes I smell the bag just to increase the high.

    I’ve almost gotten into a fight over calling people on their cell phone bullshit.

    I sometimes perform interpretive dance to the Weather Channel music.

    I just throw my shower curtain liner into the wash and it comes out fine.

    And Kath-I love the slow loris!

  7. Loud cell phone conversations in public are bad, but loud cell phone conversations in the bathroom are worse. I always make sure to flush multiple times when someone’s on the phone in there.

  8. This is hardly mindless. In fact, I’m in awe of how much your mind can actually hold.

    And OMG – YES — Steven Tyler and Melissa Rivers. Separated at birth.

    I want two female Nubian goats and I shall name them Anastasia and Lilith.

  9. Oh my gosh I want that little guy too!

  10. I wish these little giraffe’s were real. I love this guy *and* his commercials. Have you seen them? They’re greatness. You’ll have to watch the commercials to get the website.

    Finally someone with some marketing skills…

    http://www.petitelapgiraffe.com/index.php

  11. In my mind, I can’t stop singing songs from In The Heights. I fnally listened to the soundtrack and adore it. A new obsession. I am happy.
    Oh. And I miss you.

    • Yes and yes! I LOVED “In the Heights” (well, any broadway soundtrack.) It was the first (and only) show I’ve seen in New York and I fell in love. Yay!

  12. hahaha, this is fantastic and why I love you. Truth: hearing lady gaga all the time has made me resort to books on tape. thank the dear lord for the public library, i haven’t listened to the radio since february.

  13. I refuse to clean my house until my kids move out. The other day my daughter said, “when I grow up I’m going to have my own house.” I couldn’t help but answer, “me too!” My daughter’s a fricken genius. She’s 10.

  14. Aiee! My eyes! They’re bleeding! That Steven Tyler/Melissa Rivers resemblance is freaky! I’d never really noticed, but now, it will always be in my head.

    I, too, once tried to scrub a shower curtain. Exercise in futility, true?

  15. get the goat! get the goat!

  16. I want a cow! I want a cow named howie the cowie and I want it to be a girl that I can tie a hat on!

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