The OCD in me is compelling me to write this post and explain things no one has asked for an explanation about.
In other words, you get a bit of randomness to make me feel better before the good stuff starts up again next week (she says optimistically.) So let’s get on to business first, shall we?
Blog Business
This little addition to my anti-camping campaign is why this post is being written:
**EDIT: Sorry if you’re a subscriber and received a few post notification e-mails today. I was going through and tagging old posts (in an attempt to organize,) and I think the “quick edit” thing made it look like a new post. They are not. In fact, they’re old and embarrassing, so I suggest you don’t read them. Again, sorry. I have no clue what I’m doing.
It’s true. I have no clue what I’m doing when it comes to blogging and the technical/aesthetic/pimping out aspects of the hobby. Basically all I know how to do is write words and plop in a picture of something other than me once in awhile. I was trying to organize and instead think I bombarded some loyal readers with a million new post notifications, which is quite possibly the most annoying thing ever—after camping.
So I apologize. I have no Google Reader, I don’t tweet and things aren’t always fancy here in my little corner of the Interwebs. My solution to the organization thing is make a bunch of old posts private, as they were from a different time and not really representative of who I am now. I won’t bore you with that, or maybe I will, but just not right now.
The moral of the story is that organization is bad and should be avoided at all costs, but that reading my blog is good and should become something bordering on addiction, minus the shakes and support groups.
M & M Racial Profiling?
I don’t really eat candy, so I know I’m late to the game with this one. However, I was making my one-and-only recipe, and by “recipe” I mean following four directions with three ingredients—when I made a discovery.
See, I usually use holiday M&Ms because I’m fancy and make this treat for the holidays, but this time I was using plain ol’ everyday M&Ms.
While I was aware that the blue M&M had taken up the duty of melting in one’s mouth and not in one’s hand, I had no idea the light brown M&M had become extinct! Where did the light brown M&M go? I know that each color tastes the same, but I swear that the light brown M&M used to taste more milk chocolaty than the rest, therefore making up for the fact that it was light brown and not a “lucky” color like green.
Oh well. At least I don’t have to alter my “recipe.”
Cart Confusion
One final thing to overshare before I get back to not camping and writing about things of great importance (to me.) There is a reason they provide the mini shopping cart and the regular sized shopping cart. The mini shopping cart is for people buying a minimal amount of items (note the word “mini” is found in the word “minimal.”)
If you take one of the mini shopping carts and then fill it to the point of overflow and then complain that the items are falling out of your cart, you deserve to get the stink eye from me and everyone else that finds you annoying—which would be everyone.
And just to be clear—using the smaller cart loaded up with groceries does not qualify you to proceed to the Express Lane explicitly for people with 10 items or less. The size of the cart is not directly proportional to the speed at which you deserve to check out.
Whew. OK.
We’ve established that I’m stupid technologically—different than technically stupid, mind you, that the light brown M&M has been sent to a farm where it can roam free and live happily forever after and that small grocery carts are for small amounts of groceries.
OCD itch scratched.
I think my work here is done.
Let’s Wrap It Up
It’s been established that I’m not a fan of Top Ten lists or New Year’s resolutions, so this “holiday” isn’t a big deal to me.
And after an unfortunate incident that involved two measly vodka gimlets and a low tolerance on Christmas Eve with a couple of friends, I have also established that even though I only drink once or twice a year, I am never drinking again.
In other words, my actual New Year’s Eve will be low-key—as usual.
I’m going to be on the local news at 7:30 Saturday morning talking about the book again (here’s the link to my debut last week. Don’t judge.) This time it’s live TV, so I’m thinking I’m guaranteed to either ramble incessantly, sneeze uncontrollably or bust out with my own personal rendition of “Dancing Queen” while showing how I can do the splits all three ways.
After that I’ll go on with my day and wait for “America’s Got Talent” to call, spill various things on whatever sweatshirt I’m wearing and crash in bed by 10:30 like every other Saturday night. However, my mom is having the nun over on New Year’s Day, so that could be exciting.
But the point of this post wasn’t to point out that I am the reason I can’t have nice things or why I’m single—or as I prefer to call it, “independently owned and operated—but rather to break my own rule and do a pseudo-Top Ten list from the past year on this blog for the five people who are regularly reading blogs this week.
Anyway, don’t worry. Even though it was kind of a big year for me in some ways—I did turn 30, marry my couch and kind of figure out how to make pictures bigger on my blog—I’m too lazy to actually go back through the last year. So below is just a short list of stats from WordPress.
And because I kind of feel like doing something rebellious and out of character to shock you people, instead of 10 things, I’ll go with nine.
This list actually surprised me a bit, as I’m not sure I would classify all these as my nine favorite posts, but you were feeling chatty with these evidently:
All in all, I think 2011 was neither detrimental nor monumental, but just kind of mental.
I won’t go through and rehash everything I’ve written or thought about—that’s what archives and the Issue Index are for—and I won’t try and summarize 365 days in one post. I also won’t make any hard and fast resolutions for 2012 or try and predict where I’ll be 365 days from now, mostly because I get distracted and won’t remember where I am five minutes from now.
Instead I’ll thank you for reading my rambles and invite you to continue to join me for the next 365 days—or until I run out of things to say, which could be much sooner than that or an excruciatingly longer period of time more than that.
All aboard.
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