Tag Archives: minimalism

Abby’s Ark

Posted on May 28, 2012 | 34 Comments

Considering I’m pretty much a minimalist when it comes to everything in my life—save for words, as my rambles demonstrate—it will come as no surprise that the chances of me appearing on “Hoarders” are about as likely as me appearing on “The Bachelorette.”

But with that said, I often feel the need to have at least two of the same things around. Not so I can use both of them at the same time, but so I know that if something happens to the first one, I won’t be left without.

Because of course, anything that could produce even a minor inconvenience should be avoided at all costs.

For example, I have two Hot Shots. If you don’t know what a Hot Shot is, then you haven’t really lived life to the fullest. When your “happy time” revolves around tea every day, this thing lets you heat up water in less than a minute.

I bought the first one at Target a couple of years ago and then they stopped carrying them. My mom realized the gravity of this situation and ordered one for me online as a surprise almost a year ago. I haven’t had to use it yet, but it’s waiting in my pantry.

My pantry also has a backup vegetable/rice steamer that I ordered six months ago when I feared mine was on the fritz (as I use mine at least twice a day), a backup toaster, an extra case of my tea, etc. And I don’t think I have to say that when it comes to food, you will never open up my fridge to find an absence of any of my staples.

But I do have only one fridge.

I will buy a new stick of deodorant, but use the old one until the container scrapes the inside of my armpits. I will squeeze every last drop of a $1.99-tube of toothpaste like it cost me $20. I would use a tube of chapstick until the plastic hurts my lips, but I still maintain that anyone who can keep a tube of chapstick around until it’s gone without losing it is some sort of genius.

Newsflash: I am not a genius, as evidenced by the fact that I read a to-do list note to “clean stove” as “clean Steve” the other day.

Anyway, when it comes to blogging, I continue this doubled-up pattern of neurosis. I like to have another post “waiting in the wings” before I publish one so that I can a) not stress that I have no new ideas or b) hurry up and publish something new if my last post sucked.

My brain doesn’t always let things work out that way—see “I am not a genius” above—but I work with what I have.

And what I have is a veritable Abby’s Ark of things I just can’t be without. Well, I don’t have an extra car or phone or computer, but I do have an extra Hot Shot and vegetable steamer, and sometimes that’s all that I need.

Like the blog? Buy the book—or two.

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Posted in Uncategorized

Tagged I'm a weirdo, minimalism, neurosis, OCD, shopping, Sunbean Hot Shot, tea

Wherever I go, there I am

Posted on September 24, 2010 | 15 Comments

There have been times I thought a physical relocation would be the answer to my problems, that getting out of a certain environment would also mean leaving any issues there as well. And while it certainly is true that environment plays a large role in my emotional (and therefore, physical) state of being, there is no physical place I can go to escape being with myself, thinking how I think and feeling how I feel.

So when a physical move didn’t “fix” things, I thought that maybe simply ignoring them and wishing them away would make it so. While it works to put things on the backburner for awhile, they eventually just fall behind the stove and burst into flames, am I right?

Wanting something to change and waiting for it to magically happen while simultaneously ignoring the contributing factors to the situation is not going to work, at least I haven’t heard of it working yet. Things don’t just go away, no matter how much we try and physically and emotionally run from them.

Until we actually face them head on, wherever we go, there they are.

The kicker for me is that wherever I go, I also take with me every single tool I might have to use to change my situation. I don’t know how it is for you, but I could write a book about how to work through dysfunctional/disordered behavior. Every day I come to some new conclusion about myself and why I do (or don’t do) some of the things I do.

And days when I’m willing to listen to myself and even the words of others I trust, I tell myself that this time, this little revelation and nugget of knowledge will make the difference. I am always aware of what I’m doing and why and what I should be doing instead and how I can go about doing it.

But in all likelihood, I’ll keep on doing the same things. I am still the same person, only armed with a bit more insight into why I am that way.

I might start with an excuse, something along the lines of the fact that I cling to my destructive behavior as a way to cope with “real” life so I can function and be a productive member of society. Then I’ll add that my emotional tie to my actions is much stronger than any revelation or logical explanation I might have come up with. Let’s finish it up by saying that all the irrational and stupid things I do to myself are the only stupid and irrational things that I do at all, that they keep me centered and hurt no one but me.

But if I look at that sentence and par it down a bit—I am into minimalism, remember—I might find “The irrational and stupid things I do hurt me.”

It really is as simple as not doing what you know is unhealthy and doing what you know you should do. If you drink, don’t. If you smoke, quit. If you need to gain weight, eat.

The actions themselves are so basic, but the emotions we attach and the way we can fall prey to the discomfort—physical and mental—is what makes it so difficult. It’s what makes us want to escape.

But wherever you go, there you are.

And until you use those tools to step outside your comfort zone, you’ll always be where you were.

With that I shall leave you in the immortal words of my idol, Liz Lemon

“I want to go to there.”

I’m so glad the new season started.

Do you watch “30 Rock?” What shows are you looking forward to this fall?

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Tagged excuses, minimalism, OCD, recovery, routine

More or less

Posted on August 8, 2010 | 12 Comments

I haven’t written much lately about food, exercise, etc. simply because I really have nothing new to say and to be honest, I’m kind of over talking about it as a blanket issue. I’m trying more than I have in years to gain, and although my efforts haven’t been successful in terms of numbers on the scale, I have gained quite a bit of insight into the stranglehold that this crap really still has on me.

While the length of most of my posts may suggest otherwise, I am actually a minimalist in many areas of my life. I’ve written about this before, so I won’t rehash it all again, but lately it’s really come to the forefront.

Let me say this one more time— (for me) it’s not about body image, it’s not about the food in general and it’s not about feeling “fat”,” less-than or insecure. I actually am quite overconfident in many areas of my life, but when it comes to trusting myself to break my own routines and rituals, I lack any significant trust.

No, this has nothing to do with wanting to be thin and beautiful, but lately it has everything to do with getting out of my minimal mindset and acting in ways that feel completely unnatural and uncomfortable.

If I don’t “need” something, I can’t seem to justify buying/eating/doing it.

This may come across as shallow, but the overconsumption and (perceived) lack of control in our country of everything –food, money, pleasure, etc.—is part of my disdain for “more” of anything (with exceptions, of course.) And while I don’t think that many of my (perceived) “different” views on life in general are things I need to change—it’s me and I make no apologies—I can acknowledge that this particular attachment is something I need to let go of, if only little by little.

What’s hard is that I don’t feel limited or deprived of anything, so it’s not as if I feel like I’m missing out on something great.

My needs are really quite simple and even if I don’t exactly know what makes me happy or what I want, I have a good idea of what I don’t want and what makes me unhappy. In comparison to the “more” attitude of so many others, this often makes me feel like I should want something more, even if I’m relatively content.

But there are times I feel restricted by my routines and rules and right now I’m not in a healthy place. Even if I really don’t have a huge problem with it overall, I know that being where I am weight-wise is a huge problem in itself. This minimal mindset—whether it’s a minimal amount of ingredients in my food, a minimal number of social obligations or even a minimal number of dishes used at a meal—is so engrained in the way I live that I don’t know anything else.

Food both included and aside, consumption of anything “just because” feels uncomfortable and slightly out of control to me.

However, until I get to a healthier weight and place with things, I’m going to have to challenge the most difficult part of this mindset and not accept that I’m where I need to be on that level. While I might feel satisfied with less, there are times when more is necessary.

One reason I bring this up is that there is often a perception that it’s all about restricting food in an effort to fit some socially accepted ideal, when in fact it’s the complete opposite for me. While this may come across as harsh, I feel much more aversion to those who do fit an ideal or fulfill some stereotype—the stick thin model that doesn’t eat for reasons of vanity, the overweight American glued to their couch and obsessed with fast food, the business executive ignoring their core values to attain a monetary reward.

Don’t get me wrong in that these are stereotypes—I realize there are a million people who don’t fall into these categories—but people with eating disorders are also often lumped into similar groups. To each their own, but find out what the motivation is before making assumptions.

It’s often assumed that our minimal mindset equates to wanting to be as small as possible and that a lack of confidence drives us to restriction of anything and everything. In actuality, if I could wake up tomorrow 30 lbs heavier and maintain that weight, I would be thrilled. It’s the process in getting there that is grueling.

So for me, it’s about embracing the fact that including “more” of something doesn’t automatically equate to overconsumption or loss of control. It simply means that sometimes, more is more, and more is perfectly OK.

In case you missed it the first time around, check out the post swap I did with Eden of Eden’s Eats!